I am only 19 years old (almost 20 hehe) and I am already tired of worrying about having enough to pay rent and utilities and still have enough to live on and be creative with and save and blah blah blah money money! It is so heavy. I don't even pay for everything that I have. My parents still help with rent, and they pay my phone and car insurance and stuff. It's such a burden. I want to pay for it all. I don't want them to have to pay for me. I am almost 20 years old! I want all of my responsibilities to lie on me....
...but I can't handle them yet.
My job, well I make really good money. I make more than some people who work full time and that in itself is a burden. I don't want anyone to worry about money! I know that I live a very fortunate life and I do spend money unnecessarily on just silly things like going out with Alan and now I've decided to redo my apartment, but I have to do these things to stay sane. I have been fortunate enough my whole life to be able to do unneccessary things and it is hard to stop. I am sure that I could be perfectly financially stable if I just did the minimum. It is a burden to love unneccessary things.
But I almost feel like these things are necessary, or at least I can justify them. Alan and I go out and spend money to keep our relationship new and fun and alive. And then I feel like as an aspiring designer, my home is my calling card and I would NEVER have shown my apartment one week ago as a calling card and I wouldn't now. Not yet. I don't know if these are excuses.
I want to do 10,000 things at once and be able to do them well. My skin breaks out in little rashes from the stress I put on myself. It is ridiculous. I am ridiculous to let it all affect me, but it does.
The whole point of my little rant is to say that sometimes you have to take what is given to you and make it the best it can be. I can only do so much with what I have, what I am given, and what I am left with after I take. This is why I don't feel silly getting free stuff off of Craigslist or cheap stuff at thrift stores. I can take something and make it mine and give it life again. I can take the plain, old, beat up desk and with a little money, time and effort, I can make it into something that people would pay for. Because of the way I live, I can't buy this stuff off of the shelf, and I wouldn't want to because I know how much it would cost me! But it's not only that, it's the satisfaction I get from making something with my own hands and my own time, and it is beyond the simplicity of paying (alot) more to get the same product.
Be innovative and be willing to try something different. Be conscious of how you spend your money and try to find ways to get the same outcome. Want a perfect example?? Here
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